bells are ringing.

metaphorically speaking.

but
Seriously, my friends are getting married left and right. Most of my best amigas in college have gotten themselves married or engaged, and it's starting to scare me just a little bit. I've been parading a proudly single banner for all my young adult life, and I'm getting the feeling that something is hovering behind me and I can't seem to escape it.... It's the "oh my goodness, I'm getting old"-syndrome, or idea...it's really bothering me. I try to pretend that I don't care...but I'm actually starting to...really care.

I'm not sure if I'm embarassed to say this or not, but I've been single all my life. As single as a... knife --and this makes sense when you think...a knife is not a chopstick...which comes in pairs... ha yeah. Anyways, I've always held the Christian ideal that I can trust in God to bring around the one when the time comes. I also like to imagine having only ever loved one person and given myself physically/emotionally to one person. Do I have so much faith that I'll hold out for someone who exhibits good character and mission-minded passions...I always thought dating in high school and college was silly, that I'd have so many things to do and accomplish first. Now I'm working, and I've been tempted to compromise my Christian ideals...I may have even slipped up occassionally...but...somehow...I still hold to them. I still choose to believe that God cares enough to bother about me. So that creeping syndrome/idea--I think I'll just turn around, grab it and toss it to the side. I've decided to have faith, and just live my life pursuing my own good character and mission-minded passions--developing my calling and gifts.