this is getting quite difficult.

well now... i find it hard recently to pull together and get in front of my computer, find a free web proxy, and sign in to blogger. things have been quite alright recently, but my routine is a little out of the usual cycle of items. with lunar new year almost here, lots of people are gone and my set easy routine of ministries are on a hiatus. i find myself slumping. good habits are slipping. my bedroom turned into a mess. i'm watching movies late into the night. feeling hurt by random memories. then move on and hang out with friends who remind me of god's awesome grace and love...they are awesome but i've over-occupied my time which is supposedly free but not...to the point of disorganization...lack of self-reflection and lack of quality time with god. having this time of reflection right now is good as i know it will get back on track, for at least the near-term.
i think i know the things i ought to do, and the things i ought not do...recently i lacked true reflective, clear-minded, consciencious rationale...but now that i'm recognizing it i'm hoping that i will fight that weak-minded nature.
haha...(i sometimes amuse myself when looking back at my dramatic nature, which reminds me of last wednesday during dinner when dana pointed out that i was quite dramatic...) anyways moving on.
this week's love if i can divulge briefly, mainly involved contacting specific family members to show love to them--to my dad, my mom, my brother, my sisters, and sister in law-- trying to tie us together and know their prayer needs. off to bed now..